Lizette Thomas
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Highland Park resident Lizette Thomas works two jobs and lives paycheck to paycheck. She cares for her teenage son, who has autism, and her mother, who has many health-care needs.
Annotations
Welfare Programs — New Jersey has recently begun investing in, and increasing the number of welfare resources for the first time in decades. However, resources still remain inadequate for many residents. Continuing to invest in these resources (such as TANF, WIC, SNAP) will help more people who depend on them to stay out of poverty successfully do so.
Context Link 1: https://www.cbpp.org/research/family-income-support/tanf-benefits-remain-low-despite-recent-increases-in-some-states
Context Link 2: https://www.cbpp.org/sites/default/files/atoms/files/7-22-16pov-factsheets-nj.pdf
Context Link 3: https://www.njspotlight.com/stories/16/06/29/christie-s-welfare-cuts-leave-nj-safety-net-in-tatters/
Special Needs & Autism — New Jersey ranks highly for the amount of investment and resources it dedicates to special needs education, including supports for those with autism. As a result, many people move to the state to take advantage of these high quality programs.
Transcript: “Yeah, they really accommodate them. Really, yeah.”
Context Link 1: https://nj.gov/nj/education/special/
Context Link 2: https://autismfamilyservicesnj.org/
Minimum Wage & Affordable Housing — Millions of New Jerseyans have been unable to properly afford their expenses and obligations due to deflated and low pay. Recently, in early 2019, the state signed into law legislation that will increase the minimum wage for most workers by 2024 and all workers (except for tipped workers) by 2029. This will help over a million workers by boosting their pay and have an indirect benefit on hundreds of thousands more further up the income scale as businesses reform their compensation policies and the economy grows due to more residents finally having the ability to fully participate and afford critical purchases.
Context Link 1: https://www.njpp.org/reports/a-15-minimum-wage-would-help-over-1-million-workers-and-boost-new-jerseys-economy
Context Link 2: https://www.njpp.org/blog/explainer-new-jerseys-15-minimum-wage-proposal
Affordable Housing — There are various housing programs that prioritize didn't communities with unique needs for housing. This includes supportive needs housing programs, meaning that they provide access to housing vouchers for individuals and families with drug addiction challenges or other unique needs. In order for more affordable housing programs to operate successfully, the state must invest more funding into affordable homes development so there can be more vouchers for more people with different challenges and situations.
Context Link 1: http://ichoosehome.nj.gov/ooie/ichoose/housing.shtml
Context Link 2: https://www.state.nj.us/humanservices/dmhas/resources/services/recovery/supp_hsg.html
Minimum Wage — Millions of New Jerseyans have been unable to properly afford their expenses and obligations due to deflated and low pay. Recently, in early 2019, the state signed into law legislation that will increase the minimum wage for most workers by 2024 and all workers (except for tipped workers) by 2029. This will help over a million workers by boosting their pay and have an indirect benefit on hundreds of thousands more further up the income scale as businesses reform their compensation policies and the economy grows due to more residents finally having the ability to fully participate and afford critical purchases.
Context Link 1: https://www.njpp.org/reports/a-15-minimum-wage-would-help-over-1-million-workers-and-boost-new-jerseys-economy
Context Link 2: https://www.njpp.org/blog/explainer-new-jerseys-15-minimum-wage-proposal
Economic Security — Emerging research is cementing the fact that good paying jobs improve health outcomes for people. Conversely, poor paying jobs exacerbate health outcomes. As such, when people are unable to provide for themselves and their families - when they are not paid enough to survive - it can have negative impacts on their personal health. High levels of economic security therefore damage overall public health.
Higher Education — The cost of college has become prohibitive for many New Jerseyans and their families. Depending on her income, Lizette may be able to qualify for free college tuition to attend one of the state's community colleges. In 2018, the state implemented a free community college tuition program for students who come from families with $45,000 in annual income or less. The free tuition helps cover costs after all grants and aid are exhausted. While some may not see community college as a first option, it can serve as a great opportunity to secure an associate's degree and also be a stepping stone to a four-year institution.
Transcript Link 1: “…sometimes I get mad at myself for not finishing college, cause maybe if I had a better education, I’d have a better job.”
Context Link 1: https://www.nj.gov/governor/news/news/562018/approved/20180927c.shtml
Context Link 2: https://www.northjersey.com/story/news/new-jersey/governor/2018/09/27/phil-murphy-offers-more-details-nj-free-community-college-plan/1446069002/
Child Care — Lizette may have benefited from a Child and Dependent Care Tax Credit, which is a tax credit that helps parents pay for child care. This is a brand new policy that was adopted by NJ in 2018. As described the the NJ Division of Taxation, "Eligible resident taxpayers with New Jersey taxable income of $60,000 or less who receive the federal Child and Dependent Care Credit will be granted a Gross Income Tax credit."
Context Link 1: https://www.state.nj.us/treasury/taxation/newlegislation2018.shtml
Context Link 2: https://www.njpp.org/budget/op-ed-how-trump-can-help-families-with-high-cost-of-child-care
Transcript
Oh and um, I just ask for you to be like, kind of conscious about hand movements and things, cause I’ve had people bang on the table, then the mic picks that up or like rub their pants a lot.
And it will pick up.
Yeah.
Any little, cause it’s that sensitive.
Yeah, so, yeah. Just for like a heads up.
Awesome.
So I guess we can just start with basic stuff, um, can you just tell me your full name and where we are right now?
Lizette Thomas and we’re in Highland Park, New Jersey.
Awesome, have you always lived in Highland Park?
Mm, 22 years.
Wow. Um, can you kind of describe what Highland Park is like, for people who just don’t know where it is.
00:01:00
Oh, Highland Park is a pretty nice town, quiet, um, very diverse, you know, there’s a mixture of all kind of cultures. It’s nice, I just love it here, it’s really really good. School system is really good. People are friendly. It’s nice.
Um, can you tell me a little bit about what your day to day is like?
My day to day, okay, well when I was working, right now I’m on workers comp, so I’m home everyday. But my day to day when I am out working, I work two jobs, so I get up at— I leave my house like around 8 o’clock in the morning and I don’t get home until like, 11:20 at night. With 45 minutes in between to come home, you know, wash up, change into my other uniform, and go to my other job. So it’s pretty hectic, and this is like, six days a week, uh, one day off, to run around and do everything that I have to do, um, it’s just very hectic. My life is extremely hectic.
00:02:01
What are your two jobs?
One I work for WIC, Women Infants and Children Nutrition Program, which is the formula program where we help people you know, pregnant moms and infants from age zero to, newborns to five years old. And at Rite Aid, I’m a supervisor at night, so I see people at both jobs everyday, lots of people. So it’s very hectic, very hectic, deal with different kinds of people at both jobs.
And uh, yeah that sounds really exhausting.
Yeah, my life is very hectic.
Um, can you tell me about um, your family, you take care of your mother and also your son?
Yeah, my son is autistic, he’s 18, he’s going to Highland Park High right now, but he’s um, high functional autistic. My mom is 74 and she has osteoarthritis, osteoporosis, and she’s just very ill, but you know, she’s…
00:03:00
She continues to hang in there, and she’s very strong so… but she’s very sick, so I take care of three people. By myself. I don’t get any kind of assistance, I don’t get no food stamps, no social security for my son, is what I work for, both jobs. Which is not enough of course, but still try to make it. [Annotation #1]
Do you not qualify for government assistance?
Well, because you work two jobs, they have guidelines. And I only have one child, and my mom, if you don’t meet their guidelines, if you’re over their guidelines even by a penny, you don’t get it. But now that he’s 18, I can take him to apply for social security and hopefully, he will get it.
Um, I also live with my nephew who is on the spectrum too.
Okay.
Yeah, he’s much younger than your son, he’s seven.
Aw, oh okay, he’s young, so he’s just on the spectrum, also.
Yeah.
High functional?
Yeah, he’s high functioning.
Yeah, my son’s high functional, he has all A’s in school, so I can’t complain.
Kids are really smart.
Yeah, very smart, really really smart.
00:04:02
Um, what are your, I guess, it’s just different, I’ve seen and I’ve helped a lot at home, with my nephew, what are the.. I guess if any, the challenges, or what are some of the needs that might be different for raising a child on the spectrum, rather than..
Well, um, they are um, very set in their— like everything for them has to be one way, like he doesn’t like changes, like he has to eat, like he’ll eat pizza, let’s say on Monday, French fries on Tuesday, chicken on Wednesday, pork chop on Thursday. Like everything has a day, and if you switch it around? No. He’ll tell you no, today is not the day for this, you have to fix this. And he won’t eat it because it’s not that day, so you know, everything has to be, it’s the same pattern, he doesn’t like changes at all. Change is for him, like so hard. He is kind of sociable, but he’s, I’d say mostly a loner, he stays in his room, you know, he’ll come out and do his homework, get something to eat, go back in his bedroom, draw or play video games, or on the computer, or watch TV, which seldom, he’s mostly drawing or playing games, or reading, or whatever he wants to do.
00:05:23
But yeah, he’s um, they’re just different you know, they have that certain, um, for them, you— me and you, we see things differently, like he has no filter, like he’ll say something to you, like the other day he told me um, Mommy, um, Look at your stomach, you look like you’re pregnant, what are you going to do about it? No filter, but he didn’t mean nothing - you know, anything wrong, it’s just that they tell you how they feel, what they feel, and don’t think about it twice. But he’s very loving, very caring, very loving. Very smart. And, I just love him. He’s great. He’s a really good kid.
Does the school do anything to accommodate him?
Oh yeah, he’s in this special program that’s called the GLOW program, which um, helps them, like he has worked, he’s had a total of like ten jobs throughout the two years, and like, he works for like three months at these jobs. He doesn’t get paid, it’s just for him to learn basic life skills, and like, how to survive in the real world after high school. So um, they also, teach them life skills programs, like they’ll— the classroom is set up with like, a bed, a washing machine, um, printer, copier, um, everything that you can think about that he would need to survive in the world.
00:07:08
I mean, right after high school when he get out of high school, he has to know what he’s going to do with his life, are you gonna get a job? Are you gonna go to college? Do you know how to make your bed, do you know how to wash a load of clothes? Do you know how to wash dishes, do you know how, oh they take them to the grocery store, where they make their little list, they show them how to manage money, uh they take them to the bank, to learn how to write checks, um, the program is a really good program, really. And his teacher, Miss June Miller, she’s just so great. She does really really well with that program. He has learned so much and he has grown so much because of that program.
That’s amazing.
Yeah, they really accommodate them. Really, yeah. [Annotation #2]
Um, I know that you just got surgery for your foot?
Oh yeah.
Can you talk a little bit about that?
00:08:01
Yeah, so two years ago at work, I was working out of a church in Carteret, and um, for WIC, and we had our paperwork in our closet, and in front of our closet was a safe. So me and two of my coworkers decide that we need to move the safe, so we can get to the paperwork, to start working, so I grab the hand truck, my other two coworkers try to grab the safe to put it on the hand truck, but the safe shifted and fell on my foot. And that was it. It just caused many problems. I mean, we tried, my doctors tried to do everything non-surgical, possible. Um, special orthotics, I had um, shots, cortisone shots in there, given to me. I had physical therapy, I’ve had a boot, walked with a cane, braces, everything. You name it, they gave it to me, but it didn’t work. So the end result was, my doctor said, um, you know we’ve done everything non-surgical, possible, so now we have to fix it. So I had to get the surgery.
00:09:12
Um, have you had like, problems with not being able to work and paying the medical bills on top of that?
Oh no, workers comp paid for everything. Thank god. Thank god, I mean, they pay me, but you know, it’s just a percentage of my pay, so it’s not a lot, but it’s okay. It’s better than nothing. But yeah, they’re taking— thank god, they’re taking care of all the bills. Cause if not, I wouldn’t have been able to afford it. So luckily, you know. But I’ve been out since July 25th, the day of the surgery. Until now, I’m going to start physical therapy on Monday, and that’s four weeks, three times a week, so let’s see how that works, and then I’ll know when I can go back to work.
00:10:02
Can you expand on the idea of what it’s like to take care of your, well I know you talked a lot about your son, but about your mother also, on top of working?
Well my mom is very difficult also, because she is a resident, she’s not a citizen, she’s a resident so in order for you to get any type of social service benefits, for her to get food stamps or Medicaid, she has to be a resident for five years. Um, she’s not a resident, she’s only been a resident, she’s going on four years with her residency, yeah. So, I can’t get food stamps for her, I can’t get Medicaid, so we have Charity Care. Charity Care pays for some things, they don’t pay for your medication, um, you go to a clinic, which um, you know.
00:11:02
When you don’t have private insurance, to me, the treatment that you get is so much different. Like right now, she has an issue with her shoulder, I’ve been trying to get to get her an orthopedic doctor, and I can’t get it, because she doesn’t have insurance. Allegedly, the clinic say that right now, they don’t have any orthopedic doctor, that can take care of her. I don’t know how that’s possible, but whatever. It’s really hard, because she’s really ill, and all her prescriptions, we have to pay by cash, there’s no insurance, so it gets really difficult. You know, it’s um, it’s just really hard. It’s really hard to survive. You— to me, you spend more than you actually make, you know. And it’s not that I’m living over my means, because as you can see, I live very simple. I have two bedrooms, and my bedroom is out in the living room. My mom has one bedroom, my son has the other bedroom. So I sleep in the living room, so they can be comfortable back there. Um, I don’t have any luxury. My car is a 2000 Oldsmobile Bravada, which just broke down like two weeks ago, and I paid like $700 to get it fixed, and the car is still not working right.
00:12:16
Um, it’s just really hard. It’s very hard to survive but um, we try to just make it, on what little we have coming in. I just think that we, the poor people don’t get— the working, let me rephrase that, the working people don’t get enough help, as far as assistance. I see that if you don’t work, you get more help than if you do work. Which I think we should, you know, we should get equal help, because um, you know, not because we’re working, we don’t have other needs, like— we don’t make enough money. I think we don’t get paid enough to pay our bills, the rent is outrageous. I mean sometimes people are working just to pay rent, sometimes you don’t even have money left over to pay other things, or to buy food, or— but still, you can’t get food stamps because you have two jobs, and you’re over the guidelines. I just gotta, I just can’t, I think it’s not fair but I mean what can I do? You know? [Annotation #3]
Is rent a huge issue? Is that where a lot of the money goes?
Yes. Yes. Rent here is 1259 a month, and I do get Section 8, but they only pay 109 because I have two jobs— again, it goes by your income. [Annotation #4]
00:14:02
So, if I had one job, that didn’t pay a lot of money, I probably would be paying, you know, less, much much less, but no, I pay 1169, and they pay the difference, so it’s really… rough.
Can you tell me a little bit about what you do at WIC? Specifically?
Um, I do the intake, when the participants come in, sign them up for the program, determine their income, you know, you look at their income, proof of address, their IDs, if they’re coming in— if they’re pregnant, they show you their proof of pregnancy. If they have an infant, newborn, they have to come in with the newborn, they have to bring the crib card or the discharge papers from the hospital, or their birth certificate, proof of address, proof of income, if they have Medicaid or food stamps, they automatically qualify for the program. If they don’t have Medicaid or food stamps, or any social service benefits, then they need to show us pay stubs. Everyone in the household who works, they need to show that income. And then we have guidelines that we go about it. So it goes by family size and income.
I picked up something, could you just repeat that again?
At WIC, I do the intake. If the woman is pregnant, they need to show proof of pregnancy, proof of address, proof of income. If you have Medicaid or food stamps, it automatically qualifies you for the program. If you don’t have any of those social services benefits, you have to show us your paystub. Everyone in the household who works, you need to bring their income, and then we go by guidelines.
00:15:43
If you meet the guidelines, then you qualify. If you don’t, then we give you an over-income letter and then you are more than welcome to apply within two, three weeks if your income status change.
I think it’s kind of interesting that you fall into this category of people, who are kind of being, not helped by the system, but then also like..
I’m working for people, yeah, I know what you mean, yeah. Yeah, I know right. Um, yeah, yeah, I work for one of those programs that do go by the guidelines also. And there’s a lot of people, some people are over by like a penny or two, and there’s really nothing we can do. You know.
What is it like working there, and knowing that you’re also in— well, I mean, infant children is different, but you’re also in a tough financial situation.
Uh, it’s interesting. You know, because sometimes I look at it, you know, there are people that’s really really in need, and I think wow, I don’t have any problems, I said, look at her situation, hers is worse than mine, so I’m like, hmm, okay, so you know, everyone has different need, everyone falls in a different category, so I just..
00:17:00
And then sometimes, there’s people that come with an outrageous income, and still trying to apply for the program, and we’re like, okay 150,000 and you’re trying to apply for WIC? No.. you don’t, you know, unfortunately you don’t qualify. But um, yeah, it’s really hard, but like I said sometimes I see people come in with— more in need than I am, and I’m like okay, I’m not that bad off, so.
Is there anything happening with this current I guess like, administration or political climate, that directly affects either your work or your life, in general?
Umm, for now, not yet, but with WIC, there’s a lot of cutbacks right now, as you know, the president is cutting back on all kinds of programs, and WIC is one of them. So we don’t know, from year to year, if our grant is going to be approved, and we are a grant-based program, cause we, I work under the Visiting Nurse Association (?), and they are a non-profit organization, so we really rely on those grants. So if we don’t get that money, some people lose jobs, and you never know.
00:18:21
So far, so far we’ve been doing okay. But right now, people right now, our program, I think like 60 to 70% of the program, is immigrants. So you know, people are scared to come because really, of everything that’s going on. So if we don’t have clients, we don’t have a job. So hopefully things change, and um, we’re able to keep our jobs. But like I said, year to year, we don’t really know. So we’re good until October 1st. I don’t know what’s going to happen after October 1st, that’s when our grant is up.
How does it feel to live in that kind of uncertainty?
Oh, horrible. Absolutely horrible. It’s nerve-wracking. Because you don’t know, you don’t know if you go into work tomorrow and they tell you well, you know sorry, we didn’t get the grant, we have to let some people go, you don’t really know who’s gonna be the one to go, and um, it’s rough. It’s very very rough, so I don’t… I just try not to think about it. You picked up something?
No, you’re fine. Just waiting for the birds to stop tapping. But I think you’re alright.
Mmkay.
I used to work at a non-profit in Newark, also, so I know what non-profit culture is like, um, I guess, I don’t know if it’s the same for other nonprofits, but a lot of people are really starved for resources and people work a lot, like you wear very many hats. Can you kind of, expand on what your experience has been like, working for a non-profit?
Um, well we have nutritionists that do their part, and we are called WIC generalists, we do our part. We do our intake, we do height, weight and finger sticks there.
00:20:20
We do um, we give out checks, so everyone really have their own duties to do, so, I mean, you do— sometimes you overwork, because um, if someone calls out, let’s say if one person was scheduled to do the blood, and you are scheduled to do the intake, if the person that’s doing the blood is not there, you gotta do your job plus hers, but um, we try to work together. Thank god for that, so I, it’s really not that stressful when it comes to that, everybody tries to work together. So I can’t complain for now.
That’s good. Um, is there anything else, that I kind of need to know about, I guess, like, your life or anything that you would need to expand on?
Well my son, okay, when I was pregnant, my boyfriend died. So my son grew up without having a father. So that’s like, a big issue to him, and he doesn’t have a um, father figure, so he’s really, he’s always like, asking for dad. “Mom, can we go get my dad? Mom, where’s daddy?” It’s very, um, it’s sad because I don’t know how else to tell him that he’s not coming back, dad is gone, um, I, he, he can’t come back. You can’t fill that gap that he has, and you know, he wants that male figure, that male father figure, and I can’t give it to him, because there’s just that— it’s just not, that male thing is just not there, so I don’t really know. I try to compensate him in other ways, which I know is wrong, you know like if he wants a game, I say okay, you wanna get a game, you want to go to the movies, but you know, that’s not really what he wants.
00:22:25
He wants his father, and his father’s not coming back. Um, yeah, I had my son, and he’s 18 years old now, and he never really knew his father, and that’s just a big problem, it’s just so sad, it depresses me each time I see him. Cause he sees his friends with their fathers, and he’s like, well how come I don’t have a dad? And I have to explain all over. He was like, was it my fault? Was it my fault why daddy died? I said, no, it wasn’t your fault, you wasn’t even around, it was just in process, you know. It’s just, it’s hard, it’s just very hard.
I’m so sorry to hear that.
It’s okay, thanks.
How did he pass away?
Oh, he was murdered actually, so. Yeah. Somebody um, stabbed him, and he died. Yeah.
I’m so sorry to hear that.
It’s okay, thanks.
I can’t imagine…
It was a nightmare, a complete nightmare, being pregnant, six months pregnant, yeah. And your boyfriend gets murdered. It was very sad. But, I got over it, and um, you know I still think about it everyday, it’s something that you’ll never forget. But I try not to dwell on it.
00:23:59
How are you feeling about the future and your current situation, moving forward?
Um, you know, everyday, I think that things are going to get better and easier, but believe it or not, everyday things get harder, because everyday life— food is expensive, clothing is expensive, everything is just so high, and you just don’t make that much money. Like for example, if I wanted to take my son to well we have season pass, but let’s say, if I wanted to take him to Great Adventure, Six Flags, and I don’t have money to buy him anything to eat, I would have to not pay a bill, to have that extra money. Cause it’s not like I have extra money all the time. So you have to like, cut one thing… [Annotation #5]
You’re going to have to start over, from cut one thing. [bird sounds]
Let me see if I can cover them. I don’t know why, they love to… [unclear]
Is there anything I can do to help you?
No, I’m good, thanks. [Talking to birds, covering cage, calls to her mother.] Okay, so what was I saying?
You were talking about whenever you have something that—
Oh okay, so if I wanted to do something extra with my son, if I wanted to take him to Six Flags, and we need money to eat or money to buy any little souvenir or whatever there is there, um, I will have to not pay a bill, in order to go there, because I don’t have extra money.
00:26:27
Every single penny is accounted for. And you know, you have to pay the rent, you have to pay car insurance, PSEG, the cell phones, the um, gas for the car, food, clothes for my son, my mom, medication, you know if I have one or two extra bills, and it just goes on and on and on, and there’s no— I really have no extra money. I literally live paycheck to paycheck. So, yeah, it’s very very difficult. And sad, you know. Cause sometimes you wonder, like. You don’t like to compare yourself to other peoples lifestyle. But sometimes you see people, like, wow, you’re like, look at her car, look at her nails, look at her bag, look at her shoes, look at her hair. [Annotation #6] And then you’re like, oh my god, look at me. Can I afford to go get my hair done? Can I afford to go get my nails done? And you know, it’s—it’s not like you’re trying, being, what’s the word? Um.. (quietly) what’s the word, what’s the word? Okay. I’m not comparing because I’m jealous, no. It’s just that I’m looking like, wow, I’m working two jobs, and granted, you know, they say life is what you make it. But um, sometimes I get mad at myself for not finishing college, cause maybe if I had a better education, I’d have a better job. [Annotation #7]
00:28:03
But then I’m like, okay, well, I guess God doesn’t give you more than you can bear, and you know, he, I guess this is the life that I’m supposed to live. I don’t try to settle, but I try to like, make— I try to believe that, that this is the life I’m supposed to live. Being poor forever. It’s just rough. It’s very hard. Living paycheck to paycheck.
Is there a particular reason why you didn’t finish college?
Um, you know what, I want to say, I remember in 19— I came here in 1989, and then I started going to college, and I got sick with Lyme disease. I used to be sick a lot. I used to go to Middlesex and half of the time I was in the nurse’s, because I’d get fevers, chills, my joints were hurting, it was— it was really bad. And then, I just— I said, one year, I said, maybe I’ll just stay home one year and then the next year I’ll go back. And that was the big mistake, I never did. And then after that I think I just got lazy. And I didn’t finish.
Would you mind repeating that for me?
Sure, which part?
Uh, from when you said that you were always in the nurse’s.
Oh yeah, I was always in the nurse’s. Yeah, I used to go to the nurse station because um, I had the Lyme disease, and I always had either fever, chills, joint pains, I was just really sick. And um, after that, um, I took off a year. I said, I’ll take off a year, and then I never went back. I think I got lazy. You keep pushing stuff back. And then you never go back. So that’s a big mistake.
[kitchen sounds] … Let’s wait until my mom is finished, it’ll just pick up.
That’s fine, I’m fine with waiting.
00:30:39
So this is your only day off?
Well if I was working, no, I work on Sundays. I take one Sunday off a month, and um, I work for WIC on one Saturday a month. So no, I would’ve been working today.
Um, at the tail end of that, you were talking about how you, when you stop, it’s hard to start up again.
Yeah, that’s the worst mistake you can ever make. If you, if you’re going to college, never ever stop, just keep going. Because once you say I’m going to stop this, this semester, I’m gonna go back next semester, some people do, some people don’t. I never did, and I regret it every single day of my life. Granted, I know it’s never too late to go back, but how can I incorporate it in my two jobs, six days a week, from eight in the morning to eleven fifteen, eleven twenty at night. So it’s just very very hard. But maybe one day I’ll be able to do it. [Annotation #7]
You said that you went back home, or… When you came here, in 1989…
I came here in 1989. No, I ha— I went back home in 1997 for just like three weeks, and that was it, then I came back.
Where is home?
Panama.
Oh, okay. So you emigrated here?
LT: Yes, I came here. I came here in 1989. And um, I haven’t been back since. I’m a citizen. I came as a citizen, because of my dad. But um, yeah, I haven’t been back.
00:32:29
Hopefully one day I’ll go back and visit. [phone vibrates]
[Whispers] Sorry.
Yeah, that’s really rough. Um, what year is your son in, in high school?
It’s his last year, he graduates in May.
Wow, you must be so proud.
He’s happy, he can’t wait. Yes, and I’m very proud of him, he works really hard. He loves school too. Oh my god, I’ve never seen a kid that loves to be in school.
What’re his plans for college?
He wants to go to college. Um, he, now I have to look for a college that will accommodate his needs. I heard Middlesex had a good program, so I’m gonna start looking into that, the teachers are gonna help me. And then, um, take it from there. So hopefully when he goes to college, he’ll do well. Cause he’s been doing really well in high school, you know. High school and college is different, but hopefully, he’ll work as hard in college as he has in high school.
What does he want to study in college? Does he know yet?
00:33:35
Well, he likes to draw so I’m thinking liberal arts, and then he likes, he wants to be an actor, so I don’t know how that’s gonna work, so we’ll see.
What were you studying at Middlesex?
Business Administration transfer. [quietly] Yeah, and I never finished. I’m so mad at myself for not finishing, but it’s okay. Could be worse.
If we had the hindsight, we’d make different choices.
Yep, yep, yes indeed.
And I know Middlesex is pretty affordable, but is there, I guess a worry, that you’d have extra expenses with school?
Um, for me or for my son?
For your son?
I’m hoping not, um, there’s a lot of grants out there and I know that I can get some help for him, getting scholarships and stuff for him, so I’m hoping not. But you know, I’ll do whatever I have to do, loans or whatever I have to do in order for him to go to school, and stay in school, and finish school. I don’t want what happened to me, to happen to him. So I will definitely make it possible.
Is there anything else that I need to know about?
Um, well, I work at Rite Aid part time as a supervisor.
Right, what is that like?
00:35:06
Huh, very interesting. We sell liquor at that Rite Aid, which is right here in Highland Park, so um, we get a very interesting group of people. Um, but it’s fun you know, dealing with people, working, I’ve been working there for I think, it’s been 22 years or 23. And um, I know everyone in town, so, everyone that comes in. I’m a social butterfly. I’m always saying hi, how’re you doing, and everyone that comes into Highland Park that knows me. You know but um, it’s interesting, as a supervisor, you have to just stay focused, we take care of, let me see, how many cashiers, one two three, 4 cashiers, 2 in the back, 2 in the front. Pharmacy separate, but still you know, if they have a problem, and need a return or have a problem with a customer, you have to go and handle it, talk to the customer. You know, we do their breaks, do the deposit, um, the end of the night, change the drawers, um, you know, stock the shelves, whatever we have to do, put stuff up, take stuff down. It’s, it’s interesting.
Just for like, logistical purposes, so, for your schedule, you work— when do you work WIC and when do you go to Rite Aid?
Okay, so WIC, we have three shifts over there, so 8:30-4:30, um, 9-5, and 10-6, oh and on Fridays we do 7:30-3:30. Now, at Rite Aid, I go in um, 6:15-11, and on Sundays 5-11. Sometimes I’ll try to switch it up on a Sunday, I’ll try to work a morning so I can be home in the afternoon, I’ll try to do 7-1 or 7-2 or 7-12.
00:37:11
And at WIC I’ll work some evenings, they’ll have once or twice, 10-6 or 9-5, so that’s my schedule. As you can see, I have no time in between.
Can we revisit when you came to the US from Panama? What was it like for you when you were first here?
Oh, it was so different, oh my god. When I came here, you know back home, culture different, you know, you didn’t have people.. there is racism but not as bad as it is here. Um, you know, it, it was hard for me to adjust to people always read the black and the white. Um, I remember having this um, this lady well, one of my coworkers at Rite Aid, um, one of the ladies that came to pick up her prescription at the pharmacy, and she told the cashier that she didn’t want her black hands to touch her so to put her medication down on the counter, yes. That right there, threw me completely off, I was like okay, this is what I gotta deal with here. It was really, very very different. I, I, it took me a while to adjust to a lot of things. How expensive things were. Back home, things are, well they used to be very cheap, as time goes by— but it’s still cheaper than here, like rent here, what I’m paying here, over there’ll have a house with maybe five bedrooms, here, I just have a two bedroom and it’s an apartment.
00:39:00
Um, yeah, culture, very very different. Um, but I adjusted. It took a while but I did. But like I said, um, just dealing with the racism was very hard. You know, people looking at you, and making little comments or whatever, they wanted to make. And it was just very hard. But I got used to it. You get used to it. You just look at it as people just being ignorant. I just kept it moving.
It’s one of those fortunate but unfortunate things to get used to.
Yes, yes, you know, you just get used to it, you’re like okay that’s just ignorance, whatever. You know, and just keep it moving.
How old were you when you came here?
I was 20.
That’s— that’s different.
Yeah, I wasn’t a little little kid, I was a grown woman. But yeah, I adjusted.
00:40:02
And you said your dad was here first?
No, he was back home, he was in Panama. He just worked back home for the US government in Panama.
Oh, I see, I see. And so your mom is here—
Mm-mm, my mom was back home in Panama. We were all in Panama. I came, my mom came afterwards. She came when I had my son, to help me, since my boyfriend had passed away.
Ah, I see, okay.
And um, she went back and then she came back. And then she stayed and here she is. Thank god for her, I don’t know what I would have done if she wasn’t here with me. Cause you know, childcare alone, would be, it was just so much. And you know, dealing with a child with special needs, would have been a lot. But she was here and she helped, and she’s still helping. [Annotation #8]
Um, so were you in Highland Park when you first immigrated?
No, I lived in New Brunswick. I lived on Hale Street. I lived in New Brunswick for a couple of years, then— on Hale Street for a couple of years, then I lived on Lawrence Street for like two years, and then I came here. And I’ve been here since, haven’t left. And I’ve been in the country for 30 years, I’ve been here for 22. So, eight years I lived in New Brunswick. But um, you know, besides being poor and living paycheck to paycheck, it could be worse [laughs]. I’m alive, you know, um, I have my son, I have my mom. I’m working, thank god I still have two jobs, even though like I said you work paycheck to paycheck. It could be worse, I could have zero income, I could be homeless. You know, I could be out there on the streets, living on the streets and thank god I have somewhere to live. I still have two jobs, and um, I’m just trying to hang in there, trying to make it.
00:42:07
When was the last time you were back in Panama?
1997.
Oh yeah, that was when..
Yeah, but I haven’t been back since.
What do you miss most about Panama?
Ugh, the food, the beaches, the people, just everything. Back home is so nice. The food. The food, the most.
What’s your favorite dish?
Um, what we call it, um, it’s called wait I have to remember, I keep forgetting all my— olhaldra, it’s made from flour, and you fry it, and you eat that with chicharron, or chorizo, tortilla, which tortilla’s different from a Mexican tortilla, this is um, the Colombian’s call it an arepa, you know what an arepa is?
Yeah.
Well we call it tortilla, we make it out of the yellow corn itself, the yellow corn, and then you fry it, and you can eat that with cheese, eggs, steak, chorizo, chicharron, whatever like, I like all that fried stuff. Which is so bad for you but whatever, it’s what I like (laughs). And then arroz con pollo, tamales. Our tamales is different, excuse me, it’s made with the corn, and then they put a little color into it. So that the dough comes out like a little, it might look like this, and then you stuff it with whatever, pork or chicken or beef, and you have um, olives in it.
00:43:50
Some people put a little bit of prunes or raisin, it’s just so good.
So that people can know like, how large it is, can you say—
It depends, you can make it any size you want. You can make it small or you can make it really big. For parties, they make it really small, and then just for dinner size, it’s this big.
Um, I keep asking if there’s anything else that I missed, so we can go back, or anything else you’d like to add.
Um, well, like I said. I’m really very grateful for my life. You know, like I came here, and I’m grateful, like I said, I have— I’m still working, I mean, I have my son, I have my mom. You know, um, just… I would like for my life to be different, but, but I’m content with how I am. You know, just wish it was different, wish I had a different job, wish I had finished school, but like I said, life is what you make it, and hopefully before I leave this earth, it will change.